Today I was that Mom. You know, the one rushing out of the store with two hysterical children in tow? Yep, I was that Mom with those kids.
I told them NO to some toys they wanted to buy. That was NOT the answer they wanted to hear, and they just could not deal with it this morning.
Oscar was SCREAMING at the top of his lungs, Angus had tears and snot running down his face, and my patience was about to expire. I abandoned our partially filled shopping cart and called it quits. Nothing I found at the store today was worth enduring this episode of psychotic child behavior.
They screamed nearly the whole way home. Finally when they settled down, we discussed what had happened. I tried to be calm about it and talk to them about how when we throw tantrums, we don't get what we want. I told them they could try again another day, but today their chance had been lost because of the way they chose to act. ( I realize Oscar understood most of it, and that Angus is still pretty little, but still...the we had the conversation together.)
Do you ever have a hard time letting go of your children's poor behavior? I mean like, for the rest of the day you feel so upset about their behavior you seem to hold a grudge? Or that you are dissapointed with your ability to handle it a different way, that you keep replaying it in your head over, and over? I do not always feel like that, but today I do, and it feels horrible. It is like I just want them to stay in their room and leave me alone for a while. As we speak Angus is resisting his nap (even though he needs one), and Oscar won't have quiet time like I have asked.
I love my children deeply, and usually relish the time I spend with them. I feel rotten when I have moments, hours or days when I do not feel that way towards them.
Ugh.
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4 comments:
Unfortunately, I feel that way often. I hate that I feel a grudge for the rest of the day, especially since they probably have no memory of what made me mad in the first place. I have no bits of wisdom or advice for you...I'm still figuring this one out. :) You're a pretty fantastic mom, though, so I wouldn't sweat it. Your good days heavily outweigh the occasional not-so-good one. :)Good luck.
I think we all feel that way. Hang in there...it will pass, but it is a rough and rotten feeling. Maybe you are due for a little break.
I totally hear you, Helen. At that point I usually pray for some extra patience/strength/love and after a few minutes of alone time for me, one of my boys does something so endearing that all of the bad feelings melt away. . . usually :).
I can't even relate. Kidding! Actually, I'm glad you posted this because I always think that I'm the only mom who feels that way or who has children who act that way. I hate days like that too:(
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